


Naked cookies

by Kayama



Category: Death in Paradise
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-27
Updated: 2014-03-27
Packaged: 2018-01-17 04:45:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1374352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kayama/pseuds/Kayama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He just wanted some baked goods....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Naked cookies

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta read, all mistakes are mine. Mae Culpa.

“Good god man! Put on some pants!” Richard Poole used his most authoritative voice as he pointed at the naked man in the bakery.

/All/ he had wanted was to go in the new bakery and try out these 'British Delights' they had been advertising. Minced pie, scones, and there was even rumor of actual tomato and watercress sandwiches!

But when he'd crouched down and /had not/ salivated at the sight of so many home backed English goods... some chap had stepped into the store and loudly yelled 'cookies!'

Which was the first thing that annoyed him. Must they always be so loud?

Narrowing his green eyes he stood up straight and had looked at the man, which is when he'd gotten the shock of his life.

He was just in the process of pulling off his t-shirt and was otherwise naked. What the hell was going on here? Was this one of those environmental terrorists? Why couldn't they go far up in the rain-forest and hug some unsuspecting tree there?

This was preposterous. And nauseating, which really was a shame in this fine bakery.

The young man pouted at him and shuffled his feet. “But I want cookies,” he declared, not at all ashamed of his nudity and in fact seemed more comfortable in that then Richard in his woolen suit.

“Look here, you can't go around naked. The nudist colony is a few villages down and you're not allowed to go swanning about in naked outside of it. New get dressed, Sir!”

He added an authoritative look to his authoritative tone of voice.

Rule Britannia emerged from the inside pocket of his jacked. Perplexed he glanced at the pocket as if it would explain to him why his telephone suddenly had that specific ring-tone. With a growl he pulled it from his pocket. He suspected either Dwayne or, and that was the more likely culprit, Camille had changed his ring-tone. 

Again.

“Poole.” Silence, a few nods, keen green eyes keeping a careful watch of the naked man who was still begging the giggling girls behind the counter for cookies. “Yes. I know. He's right here.” A sound of exasperation. “At the new baker. Yes! Assistance would be appreciated!”

Ah. So this wasn't the first shop this hoodlum had been to. Flicking off his mobile, he points at the man. “You sir are under arrest for indecency! Now, put on your pants and I urge you to come quietly.”

It was then that naked man decided that other man was grumpy and needed a hug. Arms as wide as the grin on his face he approached Poole. “Grant will give hug and share my cookies!”

Poole did /not/ want to find out if 'share my cookie' actually /meant/ 'share cookies', or if it was a metaphor for something else. He ducked behind the counter and grabbed the nearest thing he could find. Threateningly he holds up the rolling pin.

“I'm warning you! I'm armed and.... I'm armed! I /order/ you to put your pants back on!” Swallowing hard, he wields the rolling pin and gives the naked man a look. Richard Poole's personal bubble was not to be trifled with.

A sigh, a pout, and even worse pout as before the man, apparently called Grant, stomped back to his bundle of clothes and got dressed. Poole chose to ignore the sounds of disappointment coming from the counter girls.

At that moment Dwayne sauntered in as if this nothing serious and happened every day. Who knows, maybe it did before he had taken over as head of the police force. “Take him away until someone vouches for him. Maybe a night in the cell will teach him.”

Tough, what exactly the lesson was, Poole had no idea. He sighs as Dwayne, grinning as always, leads away as if going for a beer, and turns to the glass display showing all the pastries.

“I'll come back another time. I seem to have lost my appetite.”

Honestly, some people. All he wanted was a nice home-backed, English baked good to go with his tea. But not even that wish was Granted.


End file.
